友情——生命的交相辉映
发布日期:2018-03-03 22:26

In this age of social media, the possibilities to reach and connect with people across the world have multiplied in an unprecedented manner. Add friends at the click of a button, keep them updated with your latest tweets or quickly build a following on your blog – the networking options are almost limitless. As the number of our virtual friends and followers multiply, have you ever wondered, how much of it is really “real?” What does friendship actually mean to you?

在社交媒介普及的时代,人们可以通过前所未有的联络方式与世界各地的人取得联系。点击一下按键就能添加新的朋友,更新一下Tweeter可以让他们获悉你的最新动态,亦或快速地在微博上发表一条评论——交际的方式几乎是没有限制的。随着我们的虚拟朋友和粉丝越来越多,你有没想过有多少人能称得上是真正的朋友?友情对你来说又意味着什么呢?

 

Today, Sadhguru tells us what friendship means to him.

今天,萨古鲁和我们分享一下他的友情观。

 

Sadhguru: I made my first friend at the age of three or four, after they sent me to school. I built such a bond with him, he was more than anything else to me. I still remember his name. I am sure he doesn’t.

萨古鲁:我上学以后大概三四岁的时候交到人生中第一个朋友,我们之间建立的连接很深,他对我比什么都重要,我现在还记得他的名字,但我敢肯定他不记得我。

 

I had a wide variety of friends, hundreds of friends all over the place, but that’s different. I am talking about the bond that I built with real friends – I always thought it was absolute. But over a period of time, with the experience of life, I realized there are very few people who see friendship like that. Most people see friendship as context-oriented. When you are in school, you have one kind of friend. When school is over, you just drop them and pick college friends. When college is over, professional friends, and whatever else. That’s how people look at friendship. I’ve not been able to look at it like that. I am not disgruntled, but it has been a learning experience about human nature.

我的朋友形形色色,有来自世界各地成百上千的朋友,不过我要说的是与真正的朋友建立的连接——我一直以为这种关系是绝对不变的,但是随着时间的流逝,生活阅历的增加,我意识到很少有人这样看待友情,大多数人把友情当作时过境迁之物。你在学校读书时,交到一类朋友;上大学时,便抛弃他们,选择大学里的朋友;大学毕业后,交职场上的朋友,如此种种。这就是人们对待友情的方式,但我不能这样做,也不对此表示愤慨,因为这种经历可以让我更好地了解人性。

 

My need for friendship was never too much but the moment I formed a friendship, I always thought it was for good and in every way absolute. I’ve found good friends here and there, but even for them, as life situations change, their needs and their focus on the friendship changes. For me it never changes.

我对友谊从来没有过多的需求,但是只要建立了友谊,就视之为永久不变、完全绝对的。我在世界各地交到很多要好的朋友,但是即便是他们,生活环境发生变化时,他们对友情的需求和关注力也会随之变化,但是友情对于我从不会变。

 

I wouldn’t say it is heartbreaking, but definitely it is disappointing that most people cannot form deep relationships in their lives. They can form relationships only according to their needs; they cannot form relationships beyond their needs. A relationship just for the sake of relationship, that is not there in most people. They form a relationship when they need it; when they don’t need it, they break it.

我不是说这有伤人心,但大多数人不能在生活中建立深厚的关系的确令人失望。他们只会按需交友,而不能超越需求建立友谊。大多数人不是为了关系而建立关系,他们需要时才建立,不需要时就打破它。

 

For me, friendship is not an advantageous transaction or give-and-take, for me friendship is a certain overlapping of life. 

友情对于我不是唯利是图的交易,也不是付出与索取,而是生命的交相辉映。

 

I am a little bit of a fool in such matters. Even now if I meet an old school friend, I still approach him the way I knew him at that time. But he is somewhere else, no longer the way he was. Probably they move on with life and I don’t. I have always stayed a little outside of it. I valued life that way, so I always kept it that way. I think it continues to be so even today.

在这方面,我有点傻里傻气。即使现在遇到一个老校友,我依旧会像当时那样接近他,但是他已在别处,不再是过去的他了,大概是他们随生活向前迈进而我没有,并且一直处于边缘,这就是我珍视生命的方式,且一直坚持到现在。

 

I think life has been phenomenally generous with me. When I say generous, I am not talking about material things but the way life treats me wherever I go, the way it opens up for me without any effort. The life process is willing to open up all its secrets to me probably because of the bonding that I form with whatever I sit with. Even if I am in touch with a simple inanimate thing, I form a certain relationship with it. For example if I look at what Mysore means to me, I have a very deep bonding with that place simply because I spent a large part of my growing-up period there. I am not looking at it emotionally or sentimentally as people normally would. It is just the level of involvement I had with the land, the trees, the hills, with everything around. Lots of things have changed in the last 30 years, but still I can see so many places that I walked upon, how deeply I looked at things, and the billion questions that I asked at a billion different places in Mysore. It forms a very different kind of bond which brought me to a certain level of quest within myself.

我觉得生命一直对我特别慷慨,我说的慷慨不是指物质方面,而是生命对待我的方式,无论我走到哪里,它都毫不费力地为我展开。生命愿意为我打开所有的秘密很可能是因为我与我所共处的一切建立的亲密连接。即便是和一个简单的无生命之物相处,我也会和它建立特定的关系。比如:当我思索迈索尔(印度西南部城市)对我的意义时,我感到和那个地方有一种特别浓厚的亲密感。这只是因为我基本上是在那里长大的,不过我不会像其他人一般情况下那样动情或者善感地看待它,只是感到和那里的土地、树木、山丘及周边的一切有所关联。在过去的30年间,很多事情都发生了变化,但我仍然能看到曾经走过的众多地方,想起曾经多么深刻地看待事物,以及在迈索尔十亿个不同的地方问过的十亿个问题。这就形成了一种独特的连接,让我能够在内部进行一定层次的探索。

 

For me, Mysore means a billion questions and at the same time an incredible answer too. Friendships also meant the same thing for me. Those few moments that I shared with someone, not necessarily just in terms of emotion – I was really not emotional about anyone in that sense – but somehow knowingly or unknowingly, moments of sharing were moments of uniting and becoming one in some way. I never saw sharing as giving and taking; I always saw sharing as two lives overlapping each other. I did not see friendship as an advantageous or useful thing, something that will help you live better or whatever else.

对我来说,迈索尔就意味着十亿个问题,同时也意味着一个不可思议的答案。友情对我也有着同样的含义。那些和别人分享的短暂时刻,不一定只是情感方面的——从这个意义来讲,我还真没有对任何人感情用事过——但是不管你有没有意会到,分享的过程在一定程度上就是合一的过程。我从来不把分享看作付出与索取,而是一直把它看作成两条生命的交相辉映。我亦不把友情当作是能帮助我们过得好一点的工具或者其他的什么东西。

 

Even now when I travel around the world and meet all kinds of people, I don’t network with them, I don’t keep their phone numbers, I don’t try to contact them, but I share something very deep with them in those few moments of being together and many of them do share that with me too. But my sense of that sharing is a permanent process while I see that for most people, it is a passing process.

即便是现在,我到世界各地旅行,遇到各种各样的人,我并不和他们建立关系网,我不保留电话号码,我不试图联系他们,但在那些短暂的时刻里,我和他们分享一些非常深刻的东西,而他们中的很多人也和我分享这些。但不同的是,分享对于我是永久的,而对于大多数人来说则是一个短暂的过程。

 

Probably my idea of friendship is too old-fashioned, or I don’t know if it was ever in fashion. Maybe it is a little silly, maybe it is not socially savvy, but in terms of life, I think my ability to bond with anything or anyone deeply – whether it is a tree, a place that I sat upon, a piece of land, a rock or people – has in many ways been the key which has opened up dimensions of life and nature to me.

大概我的友情观早已过时了,或者我并不知道是否流行过。可能有点愚钝,可能在社会意义上也不明智,但就生命而言,我想我和万物或众人建立亲密连接的能力——无论是一棵树、一片土地、一块石头、一个我坐过的地方还是各种各样的人——在许多方面一直是为我打开生命及自然维度的密匙。

 

So, for me, friendship is not an advantageous transaction or give-and-take, for me friendship is a certain overlapping of life.

因此,友情对于我不是唯利是图的交易,也不是付出与索取,而是生命的交相辉映。

 

Love&Grace,

Sadhguru

爱与恩典

萨古鲁

文章来源:isha.sadhguru.org/blog/lifestyle/relationships/friendship-an-overlapping-of-life
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